If it were the beginning of December, there’s a good chance I would think the picture above is beautiful – – a majestic winter wonderland of snow covered trees. The problem is, it’s March, almost mid March and I’m so over snow! I’ve had my fill of grey skies, shoveling, wet feet, freezing temperatures, layers, wet car seats from opening up my car door and snow flying in and school cancellations, I think we’ve had 11 this winter.
The point of this post is not to whine about the weather, but truly, you can feel the winter blues setting in. The other day when it was 50 degrees I resembled a bubbly ball of energy. There is something so therapeutic about bright blue skies and sunshine. Ahhhh…I know why I like to bask in the sun, it’s glorious.
Once I got over the weather this morning, my day was going okay. I was busy at work with emails flying in and out of my inbox, voicemails and adding new things to my calendar. My co-worker and I were working on something. When I returned to my desk…there sat an email from my attorney. Why do emails from him instantly make my heart race and my stomach drop?
There was nothing bad in his message. He was giving me a simple update, nothing major and still I felt a sting. At that moment I just wanted someone to give me a big hug and tell me that everything is going to be okay. I’m the mom; I’m the one reassuring my daughter that no matter what everything is going to be okay. And it is.
Before I knew it, that painful sting turned into anger. My spouse and your spouse…they are supposed to love us. When we are hurting, they are supposed to offer support and comfort. They are supposed to securely wrap their arms around us, hold us tight and help us to believe that things will be okay. They are not supposed to be the cause of our pain. It’s been so long since my husband gave me a hug – – at least 19 months ago. That was one of those times when he was living here and I actually thought we were working toward reconciliation. He fooled me…again.
Some days I can just shrug things like this off, but today it hurts. It feels cold and lonely – – just like the grey winter weather.
Thankfully, this verse was in my daily devotional today….
I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life.
John 8:12 (NLT)
iamfindingaway's Blog 
It seems to be an “I need a hug” kind of day… (((hugs)))
Aww, thanks! Tomorrow has to be better. 🙂
That is it exactly….they were supposed to be our soft place to fall our comfort in pain, but they aren’t they are the cause of pain. It hurts. It’s upside down and backward. I hope you get a really nice weekend with blue skies and sunshine.
Thank you! I take comfort in just knowing others understand. And today, the sky is blue. Yay!
So firstly….this snow has to stop!!!! Being in the midwest this year has not been so much fun with the slick roads and traffic lights out everywhere, and shoveling, and the cold. I totally hear that.
Secondly, I totally understand the hug thing. It’s been about 5 months since my soon to be ex wife had hugged me. It gets better over time though. She did try to hug me the other day when I changed her tire and helped her with some housework….but I didn’t welcome it. It wasn’t her….and the rejection she has developed for me is unwelcoming. So hopefully soon someone will be there to hug both of us! Stay strong!
It’s crazy how something so simple as a hug can make such a big difference. Good thing we both have kids to hug! And they totally give the best hugs anyway!
Here’s wishing that spring and amazing new opportunities are right around the corner for both of us.
I know I’m a little late…but I totally get it. I just said the same thing…I need a hug and for someone to tell me it will all be OK.
Ugh, it stinks! I read your post and know just where you are coming from. Sending happy wishes your way!